TTC After Loss - Page 44

Wantsababy · 04-11-2012, 06:26 PM

Hello Ladies,

I just needed to pop in here for a moment. Friday 4/13/12 was my due date and as that day approaches I feel so empty inside. We lost our baby at 9 weeks which I know isn't that long to have been pregnant but it was the best month of my life. I'm trying so hard not to show how much this hurts but I'm having a really hard time with it. Everything around me seems to have to do with babies or pregnant women. AAAhhhh I just want to crawl in the corner and cry. I so wish I had my baby this week, in my arms and healthy. But for some reason it wasn't right in God's eyes and I have to try to understand that. However, some days are much harder than others. I just wanted to say that I will never forget my baby and I hope that where ever he/she is, that its a happy and peaceful place.

You are all in my thoughts and prayers.

Lucy256 · 04-12-2012, 08:27 PM

Wants - the twins' due date was a hard day for me too. A lot of it was the anticipation of the day coming, then actually getting through the day was difficult too. We ended up doing a balloon release of 2 blue balloons at the cemetery. To me it felt a little better doing something in honor of them, but everyone feels differently about that. I know you said 9 weeks wasn't that long to be pregnant, but it was still your child and it hurts to lose a baby no matter how far along you are. I also believe things happen for a reason, but that doesn't make it any easier. I pray for peace for you tomorrow.

gatorgirl · 04-12-2012, 09:28 PM

wants i second what lucy said!

for me it was harder leading up to the day, than the actual day itself. if you and DH can find a way to honor your baby together that would be great, me and DH spent the entire day together and had a really good time. Hoping you have a peaceful day tomorrow! sending you a big hug!

Wantsababy · 04-13-2012, 06:11 PM

Thanks girls,

Its really hard today because there is so much going on in our lives right now that my husband is so focused on everything else that he hasn't even mentioned what today is. I told him this morning and he just looked sad and didn't know what to say and then - --- he didn't say anything!! It was uncomfortable because I wanted a bigger reaction out of him and he didn't know how to act. But thats just fine I will remember my baby today and say a special prayer for him/her.

It always feels better because I know you girls understand and are here to talk to. Thanks again.

gatorgirl · 04-13-2012, 10:30 PM

wants- sorry you had a rough day! i hope your evening gets better. i know men grieve and process things differently than women, but i understand how you felt by not getting the reaction you wanted.
it is different for all of us, because we know the pain and heartache you have beared! it is horrible, but i will tell you one thing, you will get through this. each day gets a little easier to breathe! sending you a big hug!!!!!!!!!!

tonight I will light a candle in honor of all of our Babies! God bless them all! may you all see the light and feel their presence tonight! sweet dreams!

04-12-2012, 08:27 PM	#432
Lucy256 Senior Member Join Date: Nov 2010 Location: PA Posts: 272	Wants - the twins' due date was a hard day for me too. A lot of it was the anticipation of the day coming, then actually getting through the day was difficult too. We ended up doing a balloon release of 2 blue balloons at the cemetery. To me it felt a little better doing something in honor of them, but everyone feels differently about that. I know you said 9 weeks wasn't that long to be pregnant, but it was still your child and it hurts to lose a baby no matter how far along you are. I also believe things happen for a reason, but that doesn't make it any easier. I pray for peace for you tomorrow. __________________ Sarah (26) Hubby (30) Married: June 14, 2008 Sept. 2008: Dx with thin PCOS BFP 5/18/11-8/27/11 lost our twin boys Alan and Blake at 18 weeks 3/22/12: HSG is all clear! 4/15/12: BFP with our rainbow baby! Beta 12 dpo: 75; 14 dpo: 199 EDD: 12/26/12 ~ Our Christmas Baby! IT'S A GIRL!! My Chart

04-12-2012, 09:28 PM	#433
gatorgirl Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2009 Posts: 338	wants i second what lucy said! for me it was harder leading up to the day, than the actual day itself. if you and DH can find a way to honor your baby together that would be great, me and DH spent the entire day together and had a really good time. Hoping you have a peaceful day tomorrow! sending you a big hug! __________________ Shawna 29 - Dustin 28 DX PCOS 2004 TTC since 2007 Metformin 1500mg daily chlomid with injectables and 3 failed IUI's BFP 7/20/2010 -M/C 10/22/2010 @ 17wk 1day Madisyn Taylor DX hashimoto's disease 12/2010 on Snythroid daily Provera 5/2011 and Accupuncture 5/2011 Prevera 8/2011 and healthy eating, herbs, and exercise! http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/33b9a1

04-13-2012, 10:30 PM	#435
gatorgirl Senior Member Join Date: Jun 2009 Posts: 338	wants- sorry you had a rough day! i hope your evening gets better. i know men grieve and process things differently than women, but i understand how you felt by not getting the reaction you wanted. it is different for all of us, because we know the pain and heartache you have beared! it is horrible, but i will tell you one thing, you will get through this. each day gets a little easier to breathe! sending you a big hug!!!!!!!!!! tonight I will light a candle in honor of all of our Babies! God bless them all! may you all see the light and feel their presence tonight! sweet dreams! __________________ Shawna 29 - Dustin 28 DX PCOS 2004 TTC since 2007 Metformin 1500mg daily chlomid with injectables and 3 failed IUI's BFP 7/20/2010 -M/C 10/22/2010 @ 17wk 1day Madisyn Taylor DX hashimoto's disease 12/2010 on Snythroid daily Provera 5/2011 and Accupuncture 5/2011 Prevera 8/2011 and healthy eating, herbs, and exercise! http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/33b9a1

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04-11-2012, 06:26 PM	#431
Wantsababy Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2011 Location: Carson City, NV Posts: 156	Hello Ladies, I just needed to pop in here for a moment. Friday 4/13/12 was my due date and as that day approaches I feel so empty inside. We lost our baby at 9 weeks which I know isn't that long to have been pregnant but it was the best month of my life. I'm trying so hard not to show how much this hurts but I'm having a really hard time with it. Everything around me seems to have to do with babies or pregnant women. AAAhhhh I just want to crawl in the corner and cry. I so wish I had my baby this week, in my arms and healthy. But for some reason it wasn't right in God's eyes and I have to try to understand that. However, some days are much harder than others. I just wanted to say that I will never forget my baby and I hope that where ever he/she is, that its a happy and peaceful place. You are all in my thoughts and prayers.

04-13-2012, 06:11 PM	#434
Wantsababy Senior Member Join Date: Feb 2011 Location: Carson City, NV Posts: 156	Thanks girls, Its really hard today because there is so much going on in our lives right now that my husband is so focused on everything else that he hasn't even mentioned what today is. I told him this morning and he just looked sad and didn't know what to say and then - --- he didn't say anything!! It was uncomfortable because I wanted a bigger reaction out of him and he didn't know how to act. But thats just fine I will remember my baby today and say a special prayer for him/her. It always feels better because I know you girls understand and are here to talk to. Thanks again.